Thank you for writing this. I have a complicated relationship with my family, so I too will be sending a couple of texts and then going into full hermit mode this weekend. I don’t have kids yet, but when I do, I really want to redirect this idea that I should be celebrated because of *my role* to them, something they had no say in! I’m against the general idea of any particular day (Mother’s Day, a birthday, Valentine’s Day) being The One Moment to Express love/gratitude/etc. That creates so much pressure for everyone, and is not true!
This is such a good attitude to have about your future kids! And yeah, I agree. I hate Valentine's Day and my husband and I don't even bother with it anymore. Overpriced menus, pressure, and fake romance is not our thing! We go out to a nice dinner several days after, when everyone else stays home.
I haven’t waited tables in decades but you mentioning it gave me flashbacks of the worst families having the worst time leaving the worst tips. I’m now a flight attendant and Sunday will spent having everyone blasting “Happy Mother’s Day!” at me just because I have a vagina.
May blessings rain down on your talented head. I howled with laughter reading this and am going to share it everywhere. Thank you for a much needed tonic.
Regarding Mother’s Day Brunch, aka Restaurant Black Friday:
I once was working it at an effing Ruby Tuesday’s in an effing mall. And the mothereffing assistant manager took a to go order for 22 dinners in the middle of the rush for the crew of an America’s Most Wanted filming in the area. (The jokes write themselves.)
Spindly the Assistant Manager (Yes. Spindly was his handle) was almost torn to shreds by the kitchen crew, who were trying to cook steaks under the toasting broiler for lack of grill space. None of us talked to him for the rest of the day.
Don’t go out unless you intend to tip generously, I beg of you.
Literally I am scream laughing at my desk because who. does. that. How dumb was this man? Never mind, I can imagine. LOLZ. He is lucky they didn't lock him in the walk in and leave him for dead.
loved the Anne Lamott quote you included! it makes me think about the end of the memoir 'I'm glad my mom died,' where she critiques the martyrdom of motherhood oh so elegantly
Well tis brings back a time in 1980. I was a young and pregnant bartender. The worst shift in a restaurant and I have always tried to say no to taking or going to the obligatory brunch ever since. The one day of the year something takes Mom and Grandmom out for a meal she doesn't have to make herself💔And all those fecking Pina Coladas, a pain to make and then leaving their greasy residue behind. Ugh!
Thank you for writing this. I have a complicated relationship with my family, so I too will be sending a couple of texts and then going into full hermit mode this weekend. I don’t have kids yet, but when I do, I really want to redirect this idea that I should be celebrated because of *my role* to them, something they had no say in! I’m against the general idea of any particular day (Mother’s Day, a birthday, Valentine’s Day) being The One Moment to Express love/gratitude/etc. That creates so much pressure for everyone, and is not true!
This is such a good attitude to have about your future kids! And yeah, I agree. I hate Valentine's Day and my husband and I don't even bother with it anymore. Overpriced menus, pressure, and fake romance is not our thing! We go out to a nice dinner several days after, when everyone else stays home.
Re: Valentine’s Day, that’s usually what we do! 😂
I haven’t waited tables in decades but you mentioning it gave me flashbacks of the worst families having the worst time leaving the worst tips. I’m now a flight attendant and Sunday will spent having everyone blasting “Happy Mother’s Day!” at me just because I have a vagina.
Oh god. Yeah. I get told to have a happy Mother’s Day too, probably bc I’m in my 40s so people just assume. It’s annoying.
Your kitties.....my kids and grandkids.....
Same...
May blessings rain down on your talented head. I howled with laughter reading this and am going to share it everywhere. Thank you for a much needed tonic.
Regarding Mother’s Day Brunch, aka Restaurant Black Friday:
I once was working it at an effing Ruby Tuesday’s in an effing mall. And the mothereffing assistant manager took a to go order for 22 dinners in the middle of the rush for the crew of an America’s Most Wanted filming in the area. (The jokes write themselves.)
Spindly the Assistant Manager (Yes. Spindly was his handle) was almost torn to shreds by the kitchen crew, who were trying to cook steaks under the toasting broiler for lack of grill space. None of us talked to him for the rest of the day.
Don’t go out unless you intend to tip generously, I beg of you.
SPINDLY DID WHAT NOW.
SIR. Sir. SIRRRRR. SIR THAT IS NOT HOW THINGS GO.
Literally I am scream laughing at my desk because who. does. that. How dumb was this man? Never mind, I can imagine. LOLZ. He is lucky they didn't lock him in the walk in and leave him for dead.
and thank you for your kind words 💖
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Exactly. I knew you’d appreciate the story.
Thanks for the prep.
loved the Anne Lamott quote you included! it makes me think about the end of the memoir 'I'm glad my mom died,' where she critiques the martyrdom of motherhood oh so elegantly
I just got a copy of that book! I'm going to read it...have this weird feeling I will find it relatable!
Yes, it's a bit triggering. But I'm trying to get over it. https://open.substack.com/pub/carolinesmrstik/p/just-another-sunday?r=h5zv&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
Well tis brings back a time in 1980. I was a young and pregnant bartender. The worst shift in a restaurant and I have always tried to say no to taking or going to the obligatory brunch ever since. The one day of the year something takes Mom and Grandmom out for a meal she doesn't have to make herself💔And all those fecking Pina Coladas, a pain to make and then leaving their greasy residue behind. Ugh!
any blender drink is a royal pain in the ass!