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Laura's avatar

This was such a great analysis and so helpful. My father-in-law is a narcissist, and we all have made our interactions with him as minimal as possible and as boring as possible so that he loses interest in really interacting with any of us, but I never knew the term “grey rocking,” so thanks for that.

I appreciate you taking the time to share your experience and analysis- it really helped me understand what happened with this election.

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Kari Bentley-Quinn's avatar

Grey rocking is very useful. I wasn't able to apply that with my own parent as things had gone way too far, but when I am dealing with a narcissist in my daily life (I now can spot them a mile away), I find it very helpful. If you engage emotionally or try to argue with them, you lose, and it is so frustrating.

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Hanne Blank Boyd's avatar

All this. Yep. And twice on Sundays.

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bluePNWcats's avatar

It didn't piss me off, Kari. I think you have a wonderfully clear sighted view of the situation and I applaud you for the cogent analysis. It is going to be a tough journey, but I hope together we can make the changes we need to make in this country in order to reunite it's citizens.

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Kari Bentley-Quinn's avatar

Thank you! ❤️

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Rob Ellis's avatar

Thank you. I grew up in the southeast in a family with plenty of dysfunction, bigotry and ignorance. In my mid-20s an inner urge to escape grew. Ultimately I left with no job and moved far away to a big city. Today I thank god that I listened to my got the hell out. My gut knew how bad it would get and it has. Most of my hometown family are dead to me. That will never change. Being far far away from it all is a great blessing.

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Kari Bentley-Quinn's avatar

Kudos to you. I moved to NYC at 17 and save for one terrible summer, I never went back home. It was very hard to be on my own so young, but I could not stay there. I would not have survived. 25 years later, I give my younger self a lot of credit for trusting my gut. Cheers to freedom.

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Rob Ellis's avatar

The ones who never left feel emboldened by their hubris and think we’re the weak ones. They never had the guts to leave. They have no idea how strong and resilient we are.

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Kari Bentley-Quinn's avatar

100%. No clue.

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Ellen's avatar

WOW! that was a lot, but honestly, it helped me to focus on what happened in a more detached way. You are so right about getting off social media at some level. I removed myself from all FB, Twitter, Tik-Tok, etc... 8 years ago. But you still receive all the propaganda via friends, family and retailers (interestingly). I apologize for my language, but it has been a "shit-storm". Seriously. Exhaustion is real, mentally, emotionally and even physically. What a nightmare. Thank you somuch for taking the time to map it out. I have forwarded this to the women in my life who I deem to be intelligant and thoughtful. I am awaiting their replies. You have a gift, keep writing.

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Kari Bentley-Quinn's avatar

I curse like a sailor so your cursing is safe here 😂 shitstorm is accurate. I’m glad you found this helpful and thanks for reading!

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Eileen Dougharty's avatar

Wise words, Kari. Especially about taking care of oneself. I know I’ve been so exhausted I’ve questioned my own name lately.

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Kari Bentley-Quinn's avatar

I hit the wall full speed today. I had ten days of rage powered hyper focus and now I need a break or my body will choose that for me. Hang in there, we’re all gonna be riding the snake for some time ❤️

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Sara Read's avatar

Thank you for this. It gave me a much needed container for the chaos in my brain.

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Kari Bentley-Quinn's avatar

I'm so glad. I had to really sit and think. And try to separate my emotions and my rage from what I knew was happening but couldn't articulate, because I have been so triggered and I was recovering from burnout. And then the light bulb went off and I was like OH MY GOD. This isn't about beliefs necessarily - which I knew - but once I viewed it through this lens it made more sense to me.

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