This is really well done. Thank you for sharing. I had NO IDEA that physical pain wasn't just some sort of anxiety attack. It was an ever-present part of my life from middle school on, with zero explanation until I was 42. It's amazing what the change in perspective does for someone struggling with RSD, and I hope this finds someone(s) that needs it.
yeah, it is really wild to make sense of it. I was told for 30+ years that my problem was anxiety. While not inaccurate, it was FAR from the entire picture.
Same. I saw so much of myself in this. I grew up with a lot of anxiety, and I was a perfectionist and people pleaser above all else. I did not realize I had ADHD until after I had my daughter (she is turning 4 this month). Even my therapist always just thought I had anxiety (and a history of disordered eating). The way that you describe your husband going silent when angry is exactly the way that it happens with my husband too and explains a lot about why it makes me panic and assume it’s my fault he’s mad.
It really makes you wonder how many of us are out there. Undiagnosed millennial perfectionist ladies are LEGION. Ditto to the disordered eating, which I plan on discussing in a later post.
As I sit here reading this, I am literally shaking. You and I share so many common elements to our personalities and life experiences. I can relate to what you have written in a way that is very rarely possible for me. I have never even heard of RSD before, but having read your article, I can say that it is a fair bet that I am also a sufferer. I mean, everything you wrote was just so familiar. The school bullying, the unsteady household growing up, the anxiety attacks, the actual physical pain that feels like a punch to your chest and can be reignited simply by reliving a memory from the distant past, the internal dissection of every interaction, word, conversation. Just wow. Mind blown.
❤️! I hope it was helpful. Not all that much has been studied on it but it’s a hallmark of the neurodivergent experience. It’s a rough thing, but knowing about it helped.
I'm going to learn everything I can about it! It is so striking when you find another person who's experiences and inner life are so closely aligned with your own. Also, keep your chin up, lady…I have experienced some heavy duty life lessons and I have a whole boatload of trauma that I am trying to recover from, but I myself am finally in a much better place than I have been. I just turned 47 and I am learning and growing and changing even now and there is hope. ❤️
This is really well done. Thank you for sharing. I had NO IDEA that physical pain wasn't just some sort of anxiety attack. It was an ever-present part of my life from middle school on, with zero explanation until I was 42. It's amazing what the change in perspective does for someone struggling with RSD, and I hope this finds someone(s) that needs it.
yeah, it is really wild to make sense of it. I was told for 30+ years that my problem was anxiety. While not inaccurate, it was FAR from the entire picture.
Same. I saw so much of myself in this. I grew up with a lot of anxiety, and I was a perfectionist and people pleaser above all else. I did not realize I had ADHD until after I had my daughter (she is turning 4 this month). Even my therapist always just thought I had anxiety (and a history of disordered eating). The way that you describe your husband going silent when angry is exactly the way that it happens with my husband too and explains a lot about why it makes me panic and assume it’s my fault he’s mad.
It really makes you wonder how many of us are out there. Undiagnosed millennial perfectionist ladies are LEGION. Ditto to the disordered eating, which I plan on discussing in a later post.
As I sit here reading this, I am literally shaking. You and I share so many common elements to our personalities and life experiences. I can relate to what you have written in a way that is very rarely possible for me. I have never even heard of RSD before, but having read your article, I can say that it is a fair bet that I am also a sufferer. I mean, everything you wrote was just so familiar. The school bullying, the unsteady household growing up, the anxiety attacks, the actual physical pain that feels like a punch to your chest and can be reignited simply by reliving a memory from the distant past, the internal dissection of every interaction, word, conversation. Just wow. Mind blown.
❤️! I hope it was helpful. Not all that much has been studied on it but it’s a hallmark of the neurodivergent experience. It’s a rough thing, but knowing about it helped.
I'm going to learn everything I can about it! It is so striking when you find another person who's experiences and inner life are so closely aligned with your own. Also, keep your chin up, lady…I have experienced some heavy duty life lessons and I have a whole boatload of trauma that I am trying to recover from, but I myself am finally in a much better place than I have been. I just turned 47 and I am learning and growing and changing even now and there is hope. ❤️
I related a lot to all of this. Now I have more letters to add to my collection. I had no idea about RSD until now. Thank you for this.
Kari our stories are so similar. I'm so glad I came across this piece. Thank you for your honest, raw writing. I wrote a little bit about my experience with RSD over on my page and list some of the best interventions I've found. As someone who has it I would be curious to hear your thoughts on it :) https://open.substack.com/pub/laurhudson/p/the-4-step-rsd-survival-guide-tackling?r=38b92l&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web